Let's go there.
Stress is no joke. And I mean REAL stress. Not the stress we thought we felt when we had no real stress, bills, or problems. Im talking about the stuff that makes you sick.
I have the ability to totally send my physical body into absolute shut down mode. Know what I mean?!
Chances are you are planning your Wedding and its not your full time job. Chances are you have a full time job or career, are trying to pay bills while maintaining any sort of sanity through this process. Its not pretty.
Your Moms guest bedroom may look like the Wedding aisle of Hobby Lobby and most likely you've stopped adding up what you're spending, and its just a mix of, "Just slide the card. We just need this. We have DIY crafts to make and a plethora of other things on the To Do List."
It feels never ending. Chances are you have fought with your fiancé, Mother, Father, Friends .. you name it, and its not because you are Bridezilla, but because you are STRESSED. Its a real FEELING, and once you experience "it", you try everything in your power to avoid it. Unfortunately, you're stuck with a Wedding Date fast approaching, and no way out. You tell yourself "it'll be over soon", and kick yourself for not eloping. I promise you one thing though, the second you walk down that aisle, and after it is all said and done, it was truly one of the most magical days of your life.
Now, I have a confession.
I didn't have a Wedding!
I NEVER dreamt of my big day. Ever. Not once. Always wanted a Family, never a Wedding. But I was going to do it. My Husband was leaving for a deployment in the Middle East so we decided to quickly go down to the courthouse and just make it happen. The plan was while he was away I would plan a Reception style Wedding where I would possibly walked down the aisle. I was on a budget. A BIG budget. It started adding up as I requested quotes and searched for venues. It just didn't make sense for me. It was spend the 20k my Husband had just made oversees for a party basically for my Friends and Family, because I myself did not care either way, OR, move out of my parents house and start a life of our own. I chose to save the money, move out, and start a business. Honestly, I would do the same thing again. My girlfriends are like OMG! You don't regret it?! And not in the least. Like, at ALL.
I live for Love. I CRY every time one of my Brides walks down that aisle. EVERY Wedding is so full of real, tangible, God given LOVE, and you really do feel it. Its one of the only times you experience it between such a large amount of people. People pray together, eat and dance together, and from my perspective, its truly different than what we experience day to day. Peoples hearts are open who sometimes have it closed. I really do enjoy getting to experience it so often now.
Now, having these moments may not have been what my modest Husband and I wanted, but I GET why girls dream about this. I want my daughter to dream about her big day. I want to throw my kids HUGE Weddings. I love how everyone is different. How one person could have no Wedding, and one person have a huge Wedding, or somewhere in the middle, and either way, to each their own. Thats the beauty of Life and Love.
If you are like me, or are planning a huge day, either way, I love it. I just want to make one point. I do not believe stress that makes you ill is worth it. I think people should really ask themselves what is most important to them. If you have an income or a Family income that suits 10, 20, 30, 40, 50++ thousand dollar Weddings, by all means, plan an amazing Day. Im really not talking to those people. Im talking to the people who may beat themselves up that they CANT have the Wedding they want. Im here to tell you, ITS OKAY! Do whats best for YOU.
If you don't have parents that can fork over tens of thousands, don't sweat it. If the cost of a Wedding will leave you in debt, or flat broke, Im here to tell you, DONT DO IT. The world we live in wants to make us think all of these little things are important, but do whats best for you. Who cares what people think. Don't get sick over a Wedding. Don't plan a Wedding you can't afford. Love is Love, either way. Coming from someone who got Married in a courthouse, a Happy Marriage is not made at a fancy Wedding, its made every single day of your life from beginning to end, with a Wedding being a small detail.
But, Lets say you are having a Wedding. Don't let the stress get to you. In the grand scheme of things, yes you will feel overwhelmed, but remember, to some people it may feel like a big production, but to others, its literally groups of people coming together, to watch Love. From behind the scenes, from my perspective, its just not as huge as everyone makes it. Its beautiful, and magical, but not worthy of insane levels of stress. Just try to relax. Once its showtime it'll happen soooo fast. I believe the small details make a big impact, but not every small detail is worth the kind of stress we put ourselves through. Eliminate what isn't necessary, focus on the big picture, and hire a team that will take care of you. Its a lot of work to do alone. If you have the money to hire a professional, DO IT. I believe the difference is night and day. Be clear about what you want, and the rest should be History. Plan a night that people will remember. They will remember the feeling that was in the air of true love and hope. Oh, and the good food, drinks, and dancing.
Im a true believer that true love can change the world. Be a part of that.
Till next time,